“I'm Done With Her”

Have you ever heard something similar?

Have you felt something similar?

I've lost count of how many people who have told me about trying to love someone, a friend, an acquaintance, a family member who was struggling in life. Perhaps it was drug addiction, or relationship issues, or maybe trouble with honesty or the law. The person in question may have had a mental illness or a personality disorder. Regardless of what was causing the problem, the person in front of me had resolved to demonstrate love to the troubled person. These “helpers” were reaching out because they sensed that the offensive person had never really experience proper love. The helpers wanted to show the troubled person what it was like to be loved. The helpers may have believed that demonstrating love was their real and only motive. Circumstances proved the lie in that belief.

The scenario usually played out like this. Several months down the road, perhaps even a year or two, the offensive person remained the same. “The nerve,” thought the helper. “All that I've done for her and she's still using dope, or she's still moving from one crappy man to another.” In more cases than we'd like to think, the troubled person even “used” the helper in some manner.

Can you imagine? That's about the time that the helper says something like, “I'm done with her.” Or him as the case may be. Were true motives known, this result could have been predicted. You see, real love never fails. Real love is not dependent on circumstance. When these kind of relationships come to an end, it's always always always because love was not the motivating factor in what the helper was doing.

The helper wasn't loving the other person. The helper was manipulating. The helper was doing something that was calculated to change another person and when that didn't work, the helper decided to withhold h/her fake love as punishment.

That's why the fact that Jesus died for us while we were still His enemies, before we even knew of His existence is so meaningful. God the Father loved the world so much that He gave God the Son as a means of forgiving our sins – no strings attached. The sacrifice was made. The debt was paid. 

Turn your allegiance toward Him in appreciation, or reject Him out of pompous self-adoration. The choice is up to you.

Regardless of your choice, God's love is the real deal.